Walk A Mile In Your Own Shoes

If it’s one thing my mother told me growing up it was to always be true to yourself. It might take you your whole life to figure out who you want to be, but that’s what makes life so interesting. That’s what makes each of us who we are.

We fumble through puberty, experiment through our teens, and fail so many times before we turn 30 that it makes becoming successful that much more sweet. Sure, some of us have a harder time than others, but if you know what’s true, chances are you’ll figure it out, eventually.

Speaking from experience, it’s not easy, at least it never seems easy at the time. You never know what you learned until it’s all over. We are constantly looking back at that person that walked out of our lives, upset and wondering why, only to realize that it was all right in the end.

The best part about it all is to accept the past. Know what you learned, and apply it to your life today, tomorrow, and in the future. I’m not saying you’re going to be perfect — no one wants that anyway.

Photo credit: http://pinterest.com
/pin/220817187950458342

But do know this:

Accept that you don’t know the future

And you might not get along with everyone

Know that despite the dislike, you still learned something

Enjoy your life

Don’t be afraid

But if you are afraid

Embrace it

That teaches something too

Love walks in

Just as fast as it walks out

We are who we were born to be

If you know that truth

Life is okay

To the Fortune 500 in the high rise

And the drag queen in the hot pink lipstick and 7-inch heels

To the full-time college student working two jobs

And the stay at home mom

To the professional athlete with all the glory

And the recovering drug addict who just got out of rehab

Be you. It's ok.

Photo Credit: http://pinterest.com/
pin/274086327293640932/
Totally my style.

Don’t ever stop what makes you happy. Recognize what makes the corners of your mouth turn up, what makes you laugh uncontrollably, and what helps you sleep at night.

Most of us quit what we love at some point only to realize that we love it that much more and without it in our lives nothing will ever be the same.

For some of us it’s love in another person, others is a sport, art, science, or even the simple life of having a family.

When you realize what that thing is, you begin to discover your truth.

There’s a lot of crap in the world, and you have to weed through it all to find the freshly fertilized pasture.

I’m still somewhere in between.

Lesson learned: I realized that if I’m not true to myself with my thoughts, attitude, and interests, I’ll never be happy. Here’s to today, may you all look ahead to clear skies and a freshly cut lawn. 

The Importance of Poll Voting

Voting is important, regardless of how you do it, but in my opinion going to a poll to vote is much more effective than mail-in ballots.

I spent the first 22 years of my life growing up in Oregon, where we used to go to the polls to vote. I remember when my dad was involved in politics, he let me punch the holes in the ballot on election day. But by the time I turned 18, Oregon had done away with voting at the polls and every election was turned into mail-in ballots. Voting hasn't been as exciting since.

Photo credit: http://partyhardpolitics.com/archives/1939

Having lived in California now for roughly a year and a half and also during a presidential election, I have realized how much mail-in ballots suck. I am happy Oregon has mail-in voting for one reason and one reason only: I can still vote and because I went home just before the election I was able to fill out my ballot. I wasn't on top of things here to register to vote in California in time.

Here are five reasons mail-in ballots suck:

1.) Families can persuade people to vote a specific way. If your whole household is conservative and you are liberal, there is a strong chance they could talk you into voting for the republican. This isn't exactly politically correct, or fair.

2.) It's easier for your ballot to be tampered with. Even though it is a felony to open mail that is not addressed to you, your ballot could be opened by someone else in your home and filled out without you knowing. For instance, if my family was crazy, my dad could have just opened up my ballot and voted for me without me knowing, if he so chose. Thankfully, he's responsible and let me do it myself. Props Dad.

3.) It's not private. Of course, you can go lock yourself in a closet and vote so no one knows what you're doing, but even when I vote in Oregon, I stand around the kitchen table talking about each person and measure. At a poll, you talk to no one and you stand behind a curtain. You have much more privacy. No one knows your vote but you.

4.) Voter turnout might be better, but it's not necessarily the best quality. People can talk you into voting one way or another, or people who decide they don't care could sit around with their friends and write each other in. Give the people who spent time, energy, and money campaigning the decency of your vote, (having lived through a campaign in my own family) they deserve it.

5.) With a mail-in ballot, you don't get the satisfaction of going out and being with the people. You also don't get to vote on election day. Instead, you have two weeks to fill it out and mail it back in and if you don't do that by a certain time, you have to go in and physically drop it off. You don't get the immediate happiness of going to the polls and voting and punching the hole. You lose that special feeling of voting, and feeling like you exercised your right with the rest of America. You also don't get that cool little sticker that says, "I Voted!"

So there you have it, the five reasons why the entire nation should still have voting in polls on election day. If you're really that lazy, or traveling, or what have you, then fill out an absentee ballot.

Regardless, EVERYONE should vote. As a citizen, it is your right and privilege and your vote counts as much as the next person. Be a proud American. 

Photo credit: http://lessig.org/blog/2009/05/wikipedians_please_vote_by_may.html

Lesson learned: I didn't think about it ahead of time enough, but I should have registered to vote in California this year, because then I too could have experience poll voting once again.

Fun fact: Today is my birthday, and the greatest birthday present would be to elect Obama into a second term. Vote! 

Dinner With The Enemy — My First Duck Game

This past weekend I experienced my first non-Civil War Duck game. The Quackers played USC in what many were hoping would be the big upset for Oregon, and although they were close, it was no cigar for the Trojans.

One of my friends who had attended the University of Oregon was in town for the weekend, so we purchased a pair of tickets for the game a couple months back. Not surprisingly, the tickets were around $120.00 apiece for one of the worst seats in the Coliseum. Regardless, we were excited and I knew it was probably going to be one of the biggest games I was going to see all season.

Photo credit: Maria Bruggere
View from our seats, lots and lots o' Duck fans.

Friday night we went to an early birthday dinner at Red O, which was delicious. After dinner we met up with some friends at the Beverly Hills Hotel for drinks. They were in town for the Duck game as well and had mentioned they had extra tickets in the Duck section that they weren't going to use. Gladly, we took the tickets offered and also rode with them to the game the next day. My friend was relieved to be in the Duck section for the game because she was nervous about how she would get treated sitting in a Trojan section. We had a Duck friend sitting with Trojans and a lot of derogatory comments were thrown at her and her family, not cool SC.

Mark Walhberg everyone.

I must also mention that we saw Mark Wahlberg walking into the Beverly Hills Hotel as we were leaving. He looks great in person and as his kids got out of the car he said to them, "Now, no shennanigans in the hotel." It was great, and my friend decided to be creepy and take this picture.








Although I was going to a Duck game, there was no way I was going to part with my Oregon State gear, not to mention I don't own green or yellow, yuck. I repped my retro Oregon State jersey all day. It confused a lot of Duck fans, but the SC fans loved it and I got several high fives.

We tailgated before the game as well and let me tell you, what an experience. Trojan tailgaters are no joke and because most of the people tailgate on campus instead of at cars, it creates for a totally different atmosphere than almost any other PAC-12 tailgater.

Ladies and gentlemen, your future Fortune 500 CEO's.

Beaver and Duck

Just before the game started, my friends gave me two more tickets they had for the row we were going to be sitting in, so I invited my friend to whom I gave the original tickets, to come sit with us — the seats were much better anyway.

Once they arrived our row became very diverse — there was my girlfriend; and most of the section in Duck gear, me in my Oregon State jersey, my friend in a tan t-shirt, and his friend in an SC shirt. Needless to say Duck fans weren't exactly thrilled, but it kept it interesting.





The game itself was as exciting as everyone had expected. It was a total game of offense, with both teams running it down for touchdowns every few minutes. At the end, Oregon was able to maintain nearly a two touchdown lead to overcome the Trojans, just as they had planned.

Throughout the game there were a couple of fights, typical bandwagon Duck fans, and some random dude who was escorted out for trying to get people to pray to the Rastafarian Gods. Random, right?

All in all, dinner with the enemy wasn't so bad and the game was wildly exciting. I have to say that watching amazing athletes such as De'Anthony Thomas and Marqise Lee was such a treat. I'm also glad I was able to go to the game and not only that, but I made it home to watch the second half of the Oregon State game too.

Two more great wins for the state of Oregon. Go Beavers, go Ducks, but don't expect to hear that second part out of me when November 24 hits.

Nobody's wiser than the man in the visor. Several 

people mistook our friend for the famous Chip Kelly 

as we walked through campus Saturday.

A Halloween of Swingers and Propositions

After what ended up a terrible Friday, I thought Saturday's full day of events would prove to be something more normal.

Ha, Ha, Ha. Oh, my life.

A manicure and pedicure with my fabulous mother to start off the day, things were off to a smooth start. We hopped over puddles in our sweats to do some last minute costume shopping before our big night out, when the mayhem would begin.

Before our Halloween Saturday night really got started, we attended a Nike/Doernbecher Children's Hospital Charity event in the city. It's an event we go to every year and a great thing for kids. The event chooses six kids from the hospital with various illnesses and pair them up with a Nike footwear designer to create a one of a kind shoe that shows off the child's life and personality.

It's a fantastic project that brings in lots of money for the hospital every year, and a touching event to kick off the holiday season. Each child touches your heart in a different way.

But our night didn't end there, and what happened after definitely wasn't touching.

After the party, we changed in the bathroom and headed out to two Halloween parties in our extravagant, but random costumes. We snuck out to the car without anyone from the charity event seeing us, but I'm not sure how they didn't notice...my mom was wearing a cape.

Photo credit: Maria Bruggere

Halloween party number only consisted of a few old friends and a great hummus and pita spread. It was good to see some old friends, but the party was starting to wind down when we got there, so Mom called the limo she had arranged to take us to the next party.

My friend and I didn't know anyone at the second party we were headed to but just decided to go with the flow, not that we had that much choice. Upon entering the party, the first people I spotted when we walked in were a very tall man dressed as a sultan and a female belly dancer with great abs and a veil over her mouth. Their costumes were great. Actually, all of the costumes at the party were great and it was also full of people who were 30 an older, so not really anyone I could relate to. Too many couples costumes.

My mom and her friends wandered off to get into trouble and my friend and I decided to post up in a corner and watch the action. That's when a man with an accent in a dark grey pinstriped suit and fedora approached us. We made the usual (he was drunk) small talk with him and then he started to ramble on about all sorts of things we couldn't understand. Entertained, we didn't hate it.

That's when his supposed "roommate" walked up to us in a homemade costume (he didn't even know what he was) and started talking to us as well. Roughly five minutes after that, a woman dressed as a flapper walked up to us, but didn't really say anything and kept looking at my friend and I. So I turned to her and jokingly said, "Do you know this guy?" and pointed to Mr. Pinstripes. His roommate goes, "Yeah he does, that's his wife!"

Ehhh....what?

She didn't seem pleased, nor did she seem upset, and eventually walked away. At some point the other two guys did too, and my friend and I made our way to the couch on the other side of the room.

However, it wasn't long before Pinstripes made his way back over to us. This time he meant business. He was really trying hard to flirt with both of us and we did nothing but laugh. "The belly dancer is attracted to me," he said.

"That's because she is a swinger," I replied. I figured he knew this. I knew this and I didn't hardly know a single person at this party. Not that it was hard to figure out. They were like two lions looking for zebras. Apparently that freaked Pinstripes out and wasn't something he was interested in.

"How about we all go to the basement," he then said.

I look at my friend, she looks at me, and we both say back to him, "So you aren't interested in this swinger chick but you want to take us to some dark, cold room when your wife is at the same party?"

Apparently he did.

I know he was drunk, but I think he may in fact be stupid as well.

He was really serious about the three of us going somewhere. I knew my friend probably hadn't been in a situation like this before (and let's be honest neither have I, but people have asked me some pretty interesting things over the years that I have quickly turned down), but we couldn't do much else but laugh. There was no way this was ever going to happen, even if the world was ending tomorrow. For starters, the both of us were too and also just plain not interested.

Minutes that felt like years went by and he wasn't giving it up. The belly dancer moved through the background behind him, still lingering for her prey. A red head dressed as Eve passed out on the couch next to me, and time just seemed to go on and on.

Then, finally, his wife shows up again. Thank you God. She was quicker to call him out on his drunkenness this time and also didn't act surprised, which meant that it must happen a lot. He was not eager to get up and follow her out. Not quick at all. He kept staring at me, and I'm staring at his wife, and she's looking and me and looking at him. It was so awkward at this point I nearly escorted him out because he just wasn't getting up.

After that was over, I realized I still had fear that the swingers were coming after me next. Not long after that, Mom realized we were ready to go, so my friend and I got a head start to the limo. We get in and guess who follows us, the Sultan Swinger and a dude dressed as a female cheerleader.

Not funny at this point.

We quickly looked at each other and non-verbally communicated that we hoped this wouldn't end bad. The swinger dude was in the car! Holy crap.

Finally, the correct people got into the car and we headed home, but not before my mom realized she left her house key in her car that was still in the city, therefore defeating the purpose of a limo.

To end it all, I didn't get home until 4:30 in the morning.

It's safe to say the next Halloween party I go to will be with people I actually know.

Lessons learned: Just because he doesn't have a wedding ring on doesn't mean his wife isn't lingering somewhere in the same room. And just because you are at a friend of a friends house, it doesn't mean that they don't have friends that swing.

It Should Have Been Friday The 13th

Holy Moly. What a day.

I woke up on a mild, but sunny Friday morning looking forward to the day. All I had to do was get through the last few hours of the work week, do my workout, and head to the airport for a weekend away.

I had it all planned out: get off work, go to the gym, pick up a quick, but very healthy dinner to take to the airport, get on a plane and be happy.

If course, even the best paid plans go astray, or something like that.

Photo credit: http://memegenerator.net/instance/24039045

So this is what actually ended up happening...

My amazing co-worker talked me into going to Ikea with her to pick up our client's beds and couch for his new apartment. How bad could that be?

It was ok, but when we realized we were $100 bucks short on the money he gave us to pay for the furniture I ended up fronting the money so we wouldn't have to drive back to the God-awful valley again this week. My co-worker's friend had met us at Ikea to help us get all the boxes from point A to point B, but couldn't fit everything in his car, so we smashed the last piece of the couch into the back of my car. If the couch looks funny on one side, I plead the fifth.

Photo credit: Maria Bruggere

Ok great, we've got the cheap furniture in the car (keep in mind I hate doing this stuff for myself, let alone another person), and drove it back over the hill to drop off.

Fine, everything went fine. I got back into my car and I'd had just over 30 minutes to get to the gym on the west side. I could do this.

I'm driving, I'm cruising, and then my car skids, stops, and the emergency light comes on telling me to "Pull over slowly and safely." WTF. Really? RIGHT NOW? ARE YOU SERIOUS?

So I pull over, put the car in park and get out to check and see if I had a flat tire. No flat tire. I got back into the car and put it in drive, and the entire car locked up. I turn the car off and back on again and everything is fine, no warning light, nothing. So I kept going, still thinking that I was going to make it to my workout, just like I planned.

Then it skids and stalls again, you've got to be kidding me.

This time it says that the motor is too hot. So I turn the car off and on back again and everything appears fine.

This continued to happen seven times for the next eight miles until I finally made it back home. I missed my workout, I was a nervous, sweaty mess from thinking my car was going to explode, and now had to figure out how I was going to get to the airport. Fan-freaking-tastic. What sort of bad karma do I have to deserve this?

Thinking I could catch the ten dollar shuttle down the street, I grabbed my two bags and proceeded to run down my street to catch the shuttle. I had five minutes to go a half a mile with 20 extra pounds of crap attached to me.

I made it. I made the shuttle.

Relieved, but still irritated, I sat next to a woman who did not want to give up the empty seat next to her (the bus was full and her stupid Gap bag was taking up an entire seat, what gives?). The shuttle actually worked out better in a way because it's cheaper and faster since we got to go in the carpool lane.

I arrived at the airport, cruised through security, saw Paris Hilton, and things were finally starting to go smoothly. Improvement noted. I hate a crappy veggie sandwich, made some phone calls, and headed to my gate.

Photo credit: http://haveuheard.net/2010/09/
paris-hilton-to-plead-guilty-to-drug-charges/

As I'm waiting at the gate, thinking we are supposed to board in 10 minutes, there isn't even a plane present. I figured it had been a few minutes late and took a seat with the rest of the people. Then I really started to wonder where the sucker was as it was after our takeoff time and there was still no plane.

Finally, I got up to look at the board, and we are not scheduled to take off until 10:30.

Is today a joke? Bad dream? Halloween prank? C'mon.

I was tired, cranky, annoyed, and now confused. Why did today happen like this?

I just pray that after I finally get on the plane that nothing else happens, at least not until tomorrow.






Lesson learned: When in Los Angeles, don't ever think that your car is going to do what you want it to do when you are trying to do something important. Also, try to make as much money as quickly as possible so you don't have to put up with buying other people's cheap furniture.

10 Things No One Tells You Before You Move To LA

When I moved to LA over a year ago I only focused on the positive things — beautiful people, sunshine, and more job opportunities. But I wish someone had told me a few of the harsh realities before moving that might have prevented my chronic honking problem and grocery cart rage at Whole Foods.

These are the things I wish I had known going into this new life:

1.) No matter where you go, 99 percent of the time you will have to pay for parking. They might "validate" but that generally just means you pay a lower price. Even to go to the grocery store you have to get a ticket and have the cashier stamp it. Alternatively, when it is a rare occurrence that parking is free for two hours, they have at least two "security guards" that patrol the lot to make sure no one is parked for longer than two hours. What a sin. But parking security must be such an invigorating job.

Photo credit: http://www.caller.com/photos/galleries/2011/apr/30/buc-days-parade/46988/

2.) Gas is at least 50 cents more than almost anywhere else in the country. I know it's typically really high in Hawaii, but I think L.A. has surpassed even that. Today, it was $4.67 for regular. I want to throw up. We HAVE to drive everywhere we go, it's just not fair.

3.) There are crazy people that walk up and down Sunset boulevard who pretend to be homeless or hungry and in reality, they are neither. For instance, just the other day this scraggly guy came up to my friend and I and asked if we could spare three bucks. After denying him, he walked by again 10 minutes later and invited us to his villa. Wait, what? Five minutes ago you were telling me you couldn't afford to eat. What kind of idiot are you? Please, spare me.

4.) It is never a good idea to move into an apartment in Los Angeles without air conditioning, even if it means cheaper rent. I live in an apartment with no A/C and I was miserable the entire summer. I would sit on my couch trying to enjoy my weekend watching movies and I would do nothing but sweat. It's foul. Go for the more expensive place if it means preventing heat stroke. Trust me.

5.) While there are more jobs in general down here in the land of sun, and you may in fact get a job, you will get paid peanuts. I'm not kidding, your check might as well be Monopoly money. You could get a job in a smaller job market and make more money even if it took you two years of unemployment and living at home. Just be prepared that if you come down here looking to work in a specific industry, you better be well connected or a hard worker, because you'll never get anywhere if you're not.

6.) You will not make as many friends as you think you will make in the first year. I moved to LA hardly knowing anyone my own age and I would say it took a good six months or more before I felt like I had people I could call a "friend." Even today I don't feel like I have made that one friend that you can call whenever. They're all back in my hometown still, living at home, and holding out for that job to get paid twice as much as me.

7.) Trying to organize something fun to do with a group of people is impossible. Everyone work at the same place or go to the same gym, but they might as well live on opposite ends of the Earth, because if you live in Beverly Hills and your co-worker lives in Silver Lake, you can bet your bottom dollar you won't see them outside of the office hardly ever unless it's work related. There's just too much traffic to deal with.

8.) Everyone is doing a cleanse. And I mean everyone, which is funny, because they're also all chain smokers and recovering alcoholics. Yeah, yeah, we get it — you want to appear healthy by drinking vegetables turned into liquid form, but you're still drinking mass amounts of coffee, inhaling each other's cigarette smoke, and stressing out about a lunch meeting like the world is ending. But don't worry, you're still cool. Rock on.

9.) If it's not on your phone, it's not important. Need I say more?

10.) Everyone has a T-shirt company. I can't tell you how many random people I have met in random places and when I ask them what they do the response is, "I have a T-shirt company." That's great and so very entrepreneurial of you, but do you know that you're out there competing with 10,000 other companies that are doing the exact same thing as you? Go back to business school buddy.

So if you are thinking about moving to Los Angeles, or maybe you already have, be aware of these things. They will undoubtedly cross your path at some point during your existence in LA if they haven't already.

Lesson learned: Get to know the natives before you pitch a tent on their land and call it home.

Why I Quit Drinking Coffee

Diets and workout routines come and go, as do the pounds but I always think the sooner you develop a healthy lifestyle the better. Some people cut out soda, some candy, others stop eating high fructose corn syrup.

I quit drinking coffee.

Shocking, I know, but it was suggested to me about three months ago and I was determined to be as healthy as possible, so I gave it a whirl.

I was advised to by my trainer who called caffeine a "drug," which in all truth, is a fact. Without saying too much, he convinced me to give up my morning treat. Instead of coffee, I now drink green tea, and I don't mind it at all.

Photo credit: www.starbucks.com

I know it's confusing when there is a new study out every week saying coffee is good for you. Like most people, I bought into it and started drinking tons of coffee. I totally embraced the coffee culture. In high school I drank mainly mochas and sweetened coffee and then moved on to regular coffee with cream in college.

I was the queen of Starbucks. Everyone knew my mom and I when we walked in to get coffee. Sometimes they would even have it ready by the time we got to the cash register. I bought Starbucks every morning and on several afternoons as well throughout college. I had my own coffee maker, became a Starbucks snob with a gold card, and wouldn't hardly drink anything else. It's actually kind of sad now that I think about it.

For the longest time it never crossed my mind that coffee wasn't particularly healthy. My parents drank coffee all throughout my childhood, it seemed normal. It gave me energy, went well with breakfast, and kept me focused on my schoolwork. What's so bad about it?

I didn't really think my life would improve if I quit drinking coffee, and it's safe to say that I was definitely addicted, but I was wrong. I have more energy and no 2:30 p.m. energy crash.

Photo credit: http://www.yourdrum.com/yourdrum/2007/11/what-the-expert.html

It took me about two weeks to adjust to the lack of caffeine I was ingesting but after that it was smooth sailing. Since quitting, I have had an easier time waking up and I maintain more of a normal energy level as opposed to one that comes and goes.

In general, I try to eat and drink foods that are natural, organic, and raw and I think that going hand in hand with no coffee drinking has given me a renewed sense of liveliness.

Although, there are times where I crave coffee and want it for just a treat, it's easy to talk myself out of it. I understand that most people won't ever quit drinking coffee because it's been apart of their daily routine for so long, but I'm happy I did it. I feel healthier and I know I'm doing something really awesome for myself.

Sometimes changes like this in life are good. It can help revive you in ways you didn't think it would. If there's something you've been doing for a long time that you know you need to change, don't be afraid to change it.

Lesson learned: Sometimes it's the little things that make a big difference.